Dating find love online searching
I go back to nights in with the cats and But I’m young! So even if you are looking for real intimacy, you suddenly find yourself valuing quantity over quality, too. Facebook encourages and discourages you to think certain ways and take certain actions, just like every other social media website. For years, hitting the “like” button was the only reaction that you could have to a post. And more often than not, they value quantity over quality. Our range of emotions as human beings has been reduced to one — “liking”. Whether you’re interacting with a post about the death of a loved one, a friend’s engagement announcement, or a rant about how crowded the grocery store is on the weekends, the only emotion that you can have and express it “like” — which isn’t even really an emotion to begin with. Now Facebook probably doesn’t do this with the intention of making us emotionless robots. And when you realize that a “like” is just a hologram of an emotion, why does it feel so good when you get the notification that someone else has liked your post? It’s about the gamification of the experience of connection. When a dating app allows you to open it up and see that you have 100 new matches, they are clearly valuing quantity over quality. I’m lighthearted, I tease, once in a while I express a genuine sentiment — essentially, I say all of the right things. That’s Facebook controlling our ability to think, feel, and express ourselves deeply.
Not only are people who are interested in committed relationships much more likely to be seeking a relationship online, but folks who date online are much less judgmental than people who only date offline. Here’s the thing: Dating apps or websites, like all forms of social media, encourage you to value certain things.Yet there they are, making you feel good with their notifications and perfect smiles. Some apps do a better job than others at facilitating real connection. Sometimes I think, “oh fuck it, I don’t need to check out all of these new guys. ”But then I remember: What if it’s Brady, who just sent an innocuous “hey, what’s up” message? And I’ve got to check out the profiles of the other 19 guys. Never mind the fact that some of these things aren’t even emotions (“I feel wow.” Yeah, that works). I’ll open up the app and have 20 guys interested in me. Now we’re allowed to have a whopping emotional reactions to the things that we come across on Facebook.